CPL Pick'Em Road Trip****Two State Edition****

[Schwab54]

Ladies and Gentlemen, Boys and Girls, Children of All Ages we now bring you all your favorite post of the week with CPL Pick'Em Road Trip Edition! This week we have a very special edition of the CPL Road Trip and we will hit two states. This is mostly because I really wanted to discuss Alaska football but apparently Alaska has had quite a few schools cancel football due to COVID so we added in a few games from the great state of Montana!
Alaska
Ben Eielson vs West Valley
I do not know of Ben Eielson, never heard of him. But his initials BE are the same as a guy I know. Let me tell you about the BE I know. This dude can yell, carries a voice spray on him so that if the voice ever starts to go he can recover quick. He's really a world class yeller. Second best yeller I have ever heard behind only the man, the myth, the legend Big Al Rood! BE loves to yell so not having football games to attend has really big hard for him. But it's been a thousand times harder for the children on his street. The crazy old man, did I mention he just turned 100? well because the poor guy can't go get a Gately dog and watch a Thursday 3:30 kickoff now he just sits outside and screams at the kids on his block. VIOLENCE! FASTER! STOP BEING SOFT! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! NO MERCY! The kids all think it's his old age. While the dude is super OLD, age did not cause this, guy is just straight up CRAZY. I don't know anything about West Valley but I know crazy is good for football!
BE by 73

Diamond vs West Anchorage
Blood DIAMOND is one of my favorite Dicaprio movies. DIAMOND Dallas Page teamed with Karl Malone to take on Hogan and Rodman, DDP lost that match. Watched Longmire on Netflix over quarantine, Lou DIAMOND Phillips was a main character. And is there a better American singer-songwriter than Neil DIAMOND?!?!?!?! Sweet Caroline! In 2019 I pick Diamond, in 2021 I probably pick Diamond but all I want from 2020 is to leave Neil Diamond alone!
West by 7

Service vs South Anchorage
In my weekly road trip research I found that Alaska has more schools named the Wolverines than any other state and in fact the Wolverines are the second most popular mascot in all of Alaska. South Anchorage is one of the many Wolverines in the state of Alaska. There are so many great nicknames for Alaska high schools to use. They are the only state with an Archangel, Arctic Knight, Beluga, Coasters, Glacier Bear, Harpooner, Sea Otter, Killer Whale, King Polar Bear, King Salmon, Moose, Shaman, Warlord and Tundra Fox. To decide to be one of 13 schools that are the Wolverines just screams boring. Hopefully the Wolverine coaches all wear pleated khakis, otherwise they need to change the name.
Service by 19

Lathrop vs North Pole
Was on Twitter yesterday and there's a new movie coming out called Fat Man. Fat Man is a movie about Santa Claus. Premise of the movie from what I could tell based on the trailer is Santa now has some deal with the U.S. Military and he gave some kid coal and the kid hired a hit man to take out Santa. Yea this sure seems like a worst movie of the year possibility. But also a movie that I bet BE would love.
North Pole by 100

Montana
Big Fork vs Anaconda
There are a few Fork named schools in Montana, don't quite get it but guess Montanyans like to eat with Forks(any other explanation would be dumb). I would much rather be the little spoon than a Big Fork. Anaconda is an underrated movie. You got Ice Cube, Jon Voight and JLO. You also have the Nicki Minaj version of Anaconda but most importantly you have but Anaconda will always make me think of Sir Mix A Lot, a true American treasure. Also Big Fork is nicknamed the Vikings, while Anaconda is the Copperheads. Big Fork is clearly confused.
Anaconda by 17

Little Snake River vs Meeteetse
So when I searched for Montana games on maxpreps this game came up. When I searched further it turns out that both of these schools are in Wyoming. So do Wyoming and Montana come together for high school football? Are both of these schools close to Montana? Are both of these schools so close to Montana that it is closer for them to play other schools in Montana than any of the Wyoming schools? What the hell kind of school name is Meeteeste and why aren't they playing in the CPL? These are the questions I want to know. For whatever it is worth Little Snake River is the Rattlers and Meeteeste is the Longhorns.
I pick Fenger in an upset!

Rocky Boy vs Chester-Joplin-Inverness
Chester-Joplin-Inverness has 2 hyphens, always a fan favorite! Their nickname is the Hawks, very basic. The school is in Chester, Montana. Was a little worried we'd have another Wyoming game. Rocky Boy is the North Stars. And also in Box Elder, Montana. Rocky Boy I feel really missed an opportunity with the school name. How do you not use the greatest Rocky, Rocky Balboa as your nickname inspiration. Rocky Balboa ended communism! The man ended communism and you call your team the North Stars and not the Balboas! Horrible!
Hyphens by 29

Glacier vs Helena
The Glacier Wolfpack vs the Helena Bengals. Glacier really ties this all together as you know we have Glaciers in Alaska. Bengals are in Cincinnati but the NWO was the Wolfpack.
Always pick the NWO they are too sweet! NWO by 17

 

[GhostOfTheGhhost]

CPL Pick 'em. Waaaaayyyyyy out west, yet shockingly only a two day train ride from Union Station on the famous Empire Builder! ALL ABOARD!

Ben Eielson vs West Valley
@Schwab54 Not sure who this BE you know is, but he sounds like exactly the kind of guy I like. Softness has no place in football. Has no place out on the range either. It certainly has no place in CPL Pick 'em, where only the strong brave a Late October 3:30 Thursday, start at Stagg Stadium!
Take Toughness. Ben Eielson with the win.

Diamond vs West Anchorage
In the 80's there was a jewelry store in Detroit named Charles Kent Reaver that ran a ton of daytime TV commercials. At the end of each one, this creepy old man gave the phone number. He'd say, "Dial D I A M O N D." I learned to spell diamond this way. To this day, I hear that creepy old dude when I see the word diamond. Maybe this is better suited for my therapist than pick em.... Oh Well, take the creepy old man with the bling bling.

Service vs South Anchorage
I hear service, I think of an old school, full service gas station. No convenience store, just gas, and some garages where you could get an oil change, or your alternator replaced. Pull up, cross over that wire that rings a bell, and the dude comes out of the garage to pump your gas. Always has a name patch. Always has a good name, like Lefty, Butch, Randy, Ned or Cleetus. Long lead in to say that Service should have those name patches on their uniforms. No doubt about that. Pick the team with Bubba on the roster. Service for the win.

Lathrop vs North Pole
Betting against Santa and his elves is like betting against Fenger. Not. Gonna. Happen. Christmas Cheer by 100.

Big Fork vs Anaconda
Every kitchen in the 80's had a giant wooden fork and spoon hanging somewhere. It was a rule. Didn't matter whose house you were in, the giant utensils were always there. I remember sitting down to countless meals in multiple houses and dreaming of the day I took them down off the wall and ate my meal with them. Closest I ever got was trying to open a Milwaukee's Best long neck bottle with one of the giant forks. Ended up with splinters in my beer. Good times.
Always bet on the utensils!

Little Snake River vs Meeteetse
Meeteese? 5 E's? Other words with 5 e's

• beekeeper
• defenselessness
• defervescence
• effervescence
• enfeeblement
• sneezeweed

Obviously, I'm taking the effervescence of the defenseless beekeeper sneezeweeds.


Rocky Boy vs Chester-Joplin-Inverness
When I was playing little league baseball, after every game we went to a little ice cream place called Frosty Boy. One of my favorite movies is Tommy Boy. The brand lettuce I buy for my salads is Andy Boy. 0.0 chance I am betting against Rocky Boy.

Glacier vs Helena
The continental divide runs through Glacier National Park. If you visit, you can travel up the mountain on the Going to the Sun Road. Apparently, it's one of the most beautiful places in the US National Park system. I visited a few years back during the last week of June. The plan was to take the tour over the road the morning after we arrived. Unfortunately, the road was closed at the top because...they got 12 feet of snow overnight. 12 feet. Overnight.
Take memories. Take Glacier.

 

[thecpsblog]

Ben Eielson vs West Valley
BE, you say? When I see BE I immediately think about those lovely CPL Thursday afternoon games with no one but the cheerleaders there. And those cheerleaders are working their tails off trying to inspire. BE! AGGRESSIVE!, BE! AGGRESSIVE! B E A GG RE SS I V E BE! AGGRESSIVE! I'll aggressive every day of the week.
BE rolls
Diamond vs West Anchorage
Diamonds are the hardest naturally occurring mineral on Earth. You think West Anchorage can run through that? No shot, none at all. That means Anchorage is going to try and get around them. Doesn't really invoke confidence. I'm going to need something more than that.
I'll take Diamond, that's a decisive advantage.
Service vs South Anchorage
When I hear Service I immediately think about the Cubs and the slew of characters, they had catching for them over the years. Scott Servais was the ultimate no name non descript place holder for some terrible Cubs teams. And just as Schwab points out pretty dam boring with that Wolverine nickname.
I'll take the South Anchorage Sea Otter/Killer Whale/King Polar Bear/King Salmon or whatever better name they got.
Lathrop vs North Pole
Fatman? Christmas? Santa and Elves? C'mon man! Lathrop homes on the Northside used to have some stuff going down over there. A buddy of mine bought a condo across the street before they were converted to whatever they are now. Day he moved in with his In-Laws helping his mother-in-law sees a dude get stabbed. That's some violence. Out on the streets, no place for it. Terrible that it happened. In between the white lines, and whistles? That the violence I need.
Lathrop brings it.
Big Fork vs Anaconda
Big Fork, Big Spoon, Big Bird, Notorious BIG, Big Pete. Everything I can think of that is Big. You know what is also big though? Anacondas! Can't sleep on them just because they don't have Big right in it's name. How can you pick in a battle of Big Snake vs Big Fork? I'll take the snake in a sneak attack.
Little Snake River vs Meeteetse
Big then little? I see what you are doing here. You're setting up the Mitch vs. Nick debate here in CPL Pick 'Em. Everyone knows the Nine Inch Nick moniker, it showed last night in beating Brady again. Some of those throws were awful though. Something tell me this debate isn't over, especially with NIN's injury history.
Give me the motion in the ocean for the upset.
Rocky Boy vs Chester-Joplin-Inverness
Boy vs. Girl (Joplin) cancel each other so we're left with Rocky vs Chester and Inverness. I know Inverness is a country club here. Seems a bit uppity for me. I mean I know we're supposed to be excited for these kids that are playing golf now instead of football but it just grates on my nerves. Where's our football season? Where's our 20 contact days even in the CPL?
Give me Rocky to knock some sense into CPS
Glacier vs Helena
Glaciers slow even stationary, seems like everything I don't want in a football player. Helena I'm just going to assume is a typo. Probably should be Helens like Mt. St. Helens, and while now dormant it is a volcano, that was once explosive and fast.
Give me the typo.